Ayame
by lissatan
Summary: Ayame always looked so happy and confident. But what if he is not? What if he is just as if not even more tormented on the inside like every other Juunishi? Would he be able to survive the torment or would he crumble? HatorixShigurexAyame, KyouxYuki, mayb
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the characters in Fruit Basket.

**Attention:** This fiction contains a little of boy x boy sex and some torture. It's a bit confusing or so my beta commented since I took liberties with the timeline and age of the characters. I even changed the gender of Akito since I like him better as a guy. The main reason is because I only watch the anime, never read the manga yet. Hehe. So if you don't like it. Don't read it.

**Summary: **Ayame always looked so happy and confident. But what if he is not? What if he is just as if not even more tormented on the inside like every other Juunishi? Would he be able to survive the torment or would he crumble? HatorixShigurexAyame, KyouxYuki, maybe others.

**Prologue**

The moment my eyes connected with eerie dark ones, my simple mind froze. No matter if Gure and Tori was there with me. My little body just shook with instinctive fear and dread. My hands clung desperately at the other two palms in fear as cold sweat swept through my spine.

Eyes that brought forth all my childish nightmares, all the monsters in closets and under the bed. Eyes of everlasting darkness and night. Eyes that withheld too much wisdom. Wisdom of millennia. Wisdom that an innocent new born should not have.

Those intelligent eyes narrowed down on me. They scrutinised and judged, weighing my worth. Then, for a moment, it gleamed with malice. My body did another involuntary shook.

His eyes. Evil and malicious. That was the first impression of our god. Our saviour. Or to my own private opinion, our true curse and doom.

But Tori and Gure never sensed anything out of the ordinary when they first laid eyes on him. All they saw was a cute and cuddling baby. They never noticed the unusual amount of intelligence the bewitching eyes held. They saw the great saviour, the god who would loved all of us Juunishi and cherish us, despite our curse. Of course they would. They were children after all and their parents had been drilling the concept into their minds since birth. They absolutely adored him and gushed all over him while I stood back.

It's not that I was a child genius. That went to Tori and even Gure was much wiser than me. Me? I was as innocent as the rest, well as innocent as a Souma child could be. But still, my parents hadn't really drilled the same concept into my head. More like, they never really noticed me. And I think as the Snake, I just simply did not fall hopelessly in love with God just because he was God. I would think first. Maybe that was the reason why God was never really fond of the Snake.

And the baby knew it. The twin black holes which locked onto mine confirmed it.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Golden orbs.

My first glimpse of my Juunishi.

Shining like the sun, they took my breath away. Always the pretty one. In fact, I'm sure that he would surpass all the others in beauty and grace, the Snake. I knew instantly. Even though I was supposed to be ignorant and innocent. The knowledge was given the moment I took my first breath. After all, I'm the one sustaining him and the rest of the Juunishi.

But the orbs darkened, instinctively. As always. Since the Beginning of the Juunishi. The Snake would always distrust me. Sometimes, It would even reject me outright. That is why the position of the Snake is the lowest among the Juunishi, surpassing only the Cat. But that is because the Cat is not part of the Juunishi.

Yet, even with this knowledge – that the boy acted instinctively due to the Animal that possessed him and not intentionally, the newest part of me, the mind of my newly born body instantly rejected the Snake. However, it was an irony that it was that particular knowledge which fuelled the initial rejection.

Sometimes, even now, I do wonder whether if I had not rejected him then, would he learn to love me like all the other Juunishi do, despite their dislike and even hatred. Through the life lines that connected me to them, I could sense that despite their preposterous actions, they still love me as a family member and as their God. All but the Snake. His heart was never mine to begin with. While the rest eventually bend to my will willingly, he had always fought against me. It seemed like the Snake for this generation is going to be rebellious type.

Well, I just have to be harsh and cruel as usual. After all, he belongs to me…


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the characters in Fruit Basket.

**Attention:** This fiction contains a little of boy x boy sex and some torture. It's a bit confusing or so my beta commented since I took liberties with the timeline and age of the characters. I even changed the gender of Akito since I like him better as a guy. The main reason is because I only watch the anime, never read the manga yet. Hehe. So if you don't like it. Don't read it.

**Summary: **Ayame always looked so happy and confident. But what if he is not? What if he is just as if not even more tormented on the inside like every other Juunishi? Would he be able to survive the torment or would he crumble? HatorixShigurexAyame, KyouxYuki, maybe others.

**Chapter One**

As Yuki entered the house, he heard voices drifting down from the hallways. A pair actually. And one of them was grating on his nerves just like its owner would. He was barely able to refrain himself from stomping into the living room to toss the obnoxious owner of the loud baritone out. That was just not him (though he dearly loved to do so) but Kyou groaned instantly when the very familiar and very annoying waves hit his eardrums.

"Not him again! That's it. This time, I'm throwing him out. No more Mr Nice Cat!" With that he did what Yuki had wished to do, with Tohru trailing behind him, trying to stop him.

"When were you ever _nice?"_ Yuki sighed quietly. As much as he loved to argue with Kyou, he just did not have the mood for it that day. Besides, he liked the house to be in perfect condition and not in a wreck.

A blast of shouting greeted him as he entered the living room. The next thing he knew, he was gathered up in a tight embraced.

"Okaerinasai! Yuki! I missed you soooo much!"

Pushing the young man away, Yuki said with polite disgust (A/N only he can pull this off! :P), "What nonsense are you talking about? I just saw you yesterday when you turned up yet again uninvited like today. And just a month ago, you had stayed here overnights for three days. That is more than I can handle now. I had enough of you and your nonsense so please leave immediately. This house does not welcome you." With that, he began to dust his clothes as if Ayame had just dirtied it with his embrace.

The room was quiet for a few moments.

"Yuki…kun…" A shocked Tohru ventured to break the silence.

But Kyou cut in, "For once I couldn't agree less with the Baka Nezumi. Get out and leave us in peace, you annoying Snake."

Ayame took this all in his stride and smiled his brightest. "I'm sure you guys are just kidding. So funny. Hahahaha. No one could resist my beauty and grace. My attract…"

"Just leave. I'm tired of you." The quiet voice cut through the loud baritone like knife through butter. Amethyst eyes locked onto golden orbs, impressing the seriousness of the statement. That the Rat was not joking at all.

This time the silence was longer than before. Tohru was too afraid to intervene. And it would have stretch longer if Shigure was not there.

"Ma… Aya-chan, didn't you just told me that your business has recently improved greatly and there are a lot of orders to complete? Well, it would not do to procrastinate them. Customers will leave if you don't finish them within the deadline."

Ayame who was obviously stunned immediately regained his boisterous self. "Of course. The great Souma Ayame is superb in everything he does. Even business is no challenge for him. My fabulous success in business only further strengthen this point. No customers ever leave my shop unsatisfied!" And he finished off this with a booming laugh. "And now, like Gure-san said, I have to be off to finish my orders. My masterpiece! Mata ne!" Then, like a whirlwind passing through, he swept through the living room, down the hallway and out of the house.

"Takku, does he have no self-humiliation? Keeps on intruding at our place even though we _specifically_ pointed out AGAIN and AGAIN that he is not welcomed."

"Kyou-kun," Tohru said, horrified. "How could you…"

The teenagers began to argue amongst themselves but Shigure paid no attention to them. He was worried for his friend. The flash of hurt and hopelessness. It did not suit the face which was ever-donning on a brilliant smile. The haunted look just seemed so out of place.

Ayame used to have these looks. The look of a tormented soul. But that was a long time ago. Shigure had even forgotten that Ayame was capable of getting sad and hurt. The Snake had been cheering him up for so many long, albeit unconsciously, with his sunny and cheerful characteristics, that he had forgotten that once, he had been the one cheering the Snake up. When did Ayame shed the tears, anger and hopelessness? Did he ever recover from them?

"Aya-chan, what happened to you?"

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_The party was so boring. All the people there were too old and prim and proper to play with. Everyone just stood there talking about stuff a four year old would not understand. Plus, Shigure was unnerved by the amount of glances and stares shot at his direction. The cool, calculating looks of those eyes._

_Though he was only four, he was smart. And he knew that behind the sweet, smiling façades was the sickening desire to manipulate and control. So, he did any four-year-old could and entitled to do. Using the restroom as an excuse, he ran from those eyes. _

_When he entered the large house of the host, he was fascinated by the traditional Japanese design since his parents opted for the latest modern design used in most houses. The house was magnificent and dark, resembling those old palaces he saw in the picture books. Instead of bricks, it was made entirely out of solid wood. Lanterns powered by electricity _

_dimly lit up the hallway he was standing now. The soft yellowish glow of the lanterns revealed several delicate porcelain vases with intricate designs along the hallway and splendid paintings decorating the wall. Maybe he was whisked away into one of those places by a fairy. He was so excited, his heart thumping as his childish mind and overactive imagination couldn't help but anticipated a regal and proud samurai strutting down the hallway any moment now; or a glimpse of a beautiful and kind princess in one of the rooms he would pass by._

_As he slowly ventured down the hallway, the darkly veneered boards cool to his small feet, he jumped when a soft, muffled sob reached his keen ears. Frozen in place, he strained to hear the sound again. After a while, he relaxed. "Must be my imaginations." His sigh was loud and audible followed by giggles. When he took another step forward, he was again assaulted, this time by a pair of shining golden orbs._

_Startled into immobilisation, Shigure could only manage a stutter, his throat too constricted to scream. "Gh… Gh… Gh… Ghost…."_

_The shining orbs suddenly dimmed after he uttered those words and disappeared with a barely swallowed sob. The soft sob jolted Shigure back to his senses. He shook his head and walked warily towards the door which the orbs vanished into._

_When he stuck his head timidly into the room, his wide chocolate eyes found a small form huddled on a large four poster bed. Then, his keen ears caught the soft unmistakeable sound of crying and mutterings. His heart melted when snatches of "Monster", " Useless…" "Ghost…", "Mama…" and "Not love" drifted into his ears. He mentally hit himself for his cowardice and approached the bed tentatively, speaking in a loud and cheerful voice, "Hajimemashita! I'm Souma Shigure! Yoroshiku onegaishimasu!"_

_The little shaking form turned rigid. "Are you here to laugh at me?" a small broken voice asked, raw fear tainting it._

"_Nope! I'm here to play with you! The party outside is soooo boring. The grownups were talking about weird stuffs I don't understand. So I snuck in here to escape."_

"_Y… You r…re…ally want… t… to… p.. pl… play wit…with me?"_

"_Yeah!"_

"_Yo… you w…w...wa…nt t… to be my f… fr… friend?"_

"_Of course!"_

_Suddenly, Shigure found himself in a tight but warm embrace. The little form was so cuddly and comfortable, he enjoyed the hug immensely and even return the favour. Breaking the hug, he peered down to have his breath taken away._

_Large golden, red from crying stared gratefully at him, piercing him, touching his innocent soul. Tears still trickled down porcelain-smooth angular cheeks. A sharp nose and rose-bud lips completed the whole masterpiece which stole his breath._

"_Erm… So… What's your name?" he asked awkwardly._

"_I'm Ayame. Souma Ayame." The child said shyly, a blush rising, further heightening his beauty. _

_By then, Shigure could only stare. "You're pretty, Aya-chan. Are you a girl?"_

"_NO! I'm a boy!" came the protest._

"_Well that does not really matters. Wanna play?"_

"_YES!" Ayame was jumping up and down in excitement, a true smile finally broke through the tears. His eyes shone like twin suns while the smile was simply dazzling, showing ivory white and perfect teeth._

_Shigure's heart leaped at his success of make Ayame smile. Silently, his subconscious made a vow to protect that smile and guard the fragile heart from pain and suffering._

_That day, the two boys spent the whole day together, playing, talking or just sat in silence. Anyway, they were glad they met each another. They found out that they were actually of the same age and both were in fact juunichi. This knowledge only brought them closer._

_Both were sitting on Ayame's bed after a superb game of hide-and-seek. The house was enormous and ideal for the game after all._

"_Ne… Gure-chan."_

"_Nani, Aya-chan?"_

"_I am so glad to meet you today. I never felt so happy and lucky. So don't forget me when you leave. I don't mind if I never see you again. Just remember me, ok?"_

_Shigure's heat clenched at the sad tone of the plea._

"_Tell you what Aya-chan. Let's become blood brothers."_

"_Blood brothers?"_

"_I saw it on the television the other day. By sharing blood, we could become blood brothers, connected by the blood we share."_

"_But how do we share?"_

"_Easy. Each of us cut one of our palms. Then we hold the wounds together for sometimes to let to blood flow for a while and we're done! Sealed as blood brothers for life. Inseparable."_

"_Really?" Two large liquid gold, hopefully stared at him. He nodded confidently, earning a second embrace that day and a shout of "thank you" from the silver head. _

_Without further ado, the two friends performed the ceremony and thus became blood brothers. _

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

A wave of sudden sadness engulfed his whole body, bringing tears to his eyes. An involuntary sob escaped his mouth.

"Akito-sama. Daijoubu?" a concerned Hatori asked. "Where do you feel painful? Did I hurt you somehow?"

Suppressing his feelings, Akito managed a smile which looked more like a grimace to the beholder. "It is nothing. Just a wave of dizziness as usual."

"But the…"

"It's alright. Now leave. I need some time alone." And he waved his hand as a sign of dismissal.

As he blocked the wave of sadness, a weak throb of concern, barely a tingle rose. This only heightened his glee and turned the grimace into a smug smile.

He couldn't help it. Hatori was feeling genuine concern for him. Him alone. No one else. Not that stupid Kana. The life lines connecting Master and Juunishi were the reason why he was able to sense the feelings. He could distinguish a few of his favourites. Actually every Juunishi has a distinct life line, a trait that set them apart from the others. But Akito never bothered to learn all, just the few of his beloved Animals, namely Hatori, Shigure, Kureno and Yuki.

Oh! And one more. The recent wave of sadness. The intensity of it, so powerful, it was able to influence his mind and feelings. Powerful enough to wrench tears and even a sob from him. Even Yuki did not influence him like that, not that strongly. Yuki's life line to him was never that strong. His was the same as the rest. When feelings were transmitted, it was weak compared to that particular life line. Like comparing a candle light to a furnace, or a gentle wave to a tsunami.

Feeling the intense sadness brought pure mirth and glee to Akito. He was proven right, as usual. No one would love his Juunishi like he did. Why did they keep trying to hurt themselves by rejecting him and seeking the outside world. Couldn't they see that he was all they ever needed. That his love would satisfy their thirsty souls. That he was theirs and they were his, God and Juunishi, Master and Pets.

But no. Even his most precious Yuki left him. Now the Rat had his eyes glued onto the stupid girl Tohru, bewitched and tricked by her cunning charm. So entranced by her, he even skipped the New Year Feast. That Tohru bitch would pay one day for meddling with his Rat, for getting in the way between him and his beloved. It was all her fault. Her fault that the bond between him and Yuki grew more estrange every second. Her fault for stealing Yuki. That good-for-nothing witch! In his deranged mind, he saw Yuki as the victim, a pure innocent Rat fallen into the snares of a black cloaked and cackling Tohru.

Now, he was rather pleased with himself. His action has been justified yet again and at the same time, he could feel genuine concern radiating from Hatori, deepening their bond. Killing two Juunishi with one stone.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Hatori was worried. Akito was acting weirder than usual during his 3 o'clock check up. First he cried for no particular reason then the man suddenly burst into fits of maniac giggles. 

Maybe the young Master had lost his marbles. A stab of pain pierced through his heart at that thought.

No matter what Akito did, he still loved the man as a brother. A younger spoiled brother who had a fatal disease. Even if he was the one of drove Kana crazy and out of his life, Hatori would still care for Akito. The dragon knew that Akito did it in a desperate act to protect him, to prevent the hurt of rejection after a life of bliss. For Hatori had seen Kana for who she really was. While she was still able to accept Hatori as a Juunishi, the gentle lady had shown her weak will and mental strength when assaulted by Akito. She completely broke down when Akito confronted her and poisoned her mind, planting the seed of guilt and madness. Like growing on fertile land with optimum condition, the seed took root and grew into a monster, tearing up Kana from inside.

This proved her weak state of mind. And this kind of person could never survive in the Souma Clan. In this twisted family, only the strong willed ones would remain. The weak would be utterly consumed by the manipulation and the twisted games played among family members. He himself was barely able to avoid from drowning and Hatori doubt that he could keep both him and Kana afloat in this demented family. In short, simple terms, he and Kana was not meant to be. And he was ever grateful of Akito for the realisation.

However, that did not mean that he could ignore the love and passion he shared with the wonderful woman. His heart shattered like porcelain on a rock when he had to erase every single memory of him from her mind. To save her. With every step she took away from him, he felt a stab on his heart. The first few days without her were awful and would had been worse if Shigure and Ayame were not there for him.

Speaking of Ayame, Hatori glanced at the clock. The Snake was extremely late. Not that he and the silver-haired man had an appointment. It's just that every day without failure and unusually on time, the snake would arrive at his house at 4 o'clock sharp to pester him. But now, the digital clock on his wall displayed 5 o'clock.

Ayame was very easy to predict. Once he had fallen into a certain habit he would almost never break the habit. Like pestering him around four. It started right after his break up with Kana. At that time, Shigure would follow suit, just to be there for him and cheer him up. When he had eventually regained some of his old composed self, Shigure stopped visiting but the Snake never. That was two years ago. Come rain or shine or even snow, he would be here at four, his loud baritone announcing his arrival. Sometimes, it was rather annoying when Hatori was busy. But he was used to the loud and hyperactive Ayame. Thus, he tolerated the visits and even came to enjoy it, sometimes making it a point to leave the period between four to five free just so he could enjoy the cheerful company.

By now, the house would be filled with merry laughter and wild proclamation. But today, the silence was painful, so silent, the tinkle of the pin hitting the floor would have brought forth echo. The house seemed to miss the melodious laughter, holding its breath, waiting for the explosion of sound. But it never came. And the owner himself was having the same problem. He'd never thought that there would be the day when he would miss the typhoon that was Ayame.

Where did that Snake disappear to? He was never late before. God knows about his irrational fuss for punctuality. Forever quoting the infamous Gandalf from his favourite novel 

the Lord of the Rings, "A man is never late nor is he early. He arrives at exactly when he is needed.", Ayame took outrageous measures just to be sure he was punctual.

"Where are you, Ayame?"

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_Hatori sighed softly. The last family gathering was so meaningless and boring. Meaningless because he couldn't complete the task his father gave him. Boring… because of the task too. That day, his father had taken aside while his mother was putting on the finishing touch of make up._

"_Hatori, I have something I need you to do." His stern father said._

_Hatori, always eager to please his father though he never show outwardly, answered solemnly "Yes, father."_

"_Thus party we're going, is the first family gathering you'll be attending. The whole Souma Clan will be showing up. But the most important point is all the Juunishi will be there, from the Rat until the Boar. What I need you to do is befriend the Dog. He is the same age as you and this is his first party as well. He might be bored thus you could take the chance to know and play with him. Understand?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Good. Like I said, the boy is around your age and he has black hair and brown eyes. Don't get the wrong person, Hatori."_

"_Yes." Thinking that was all, he turned to leave only to have his father stopping him._

"_And one more thing, Try to stay away from a silver-haired, yellow-eyed boy."_

"_Yes, Chichiwei. I'll try my best."_

_A proud and satisfied smile graced his stoic father's face after the proclamation. "That's my boy."_

_With that, he left to enter the car waiting outside, determination burning in his heart, determination to bring forth the rare smile he received just now. _

'I can do this. This is easy. Just befriend a boy my age. Even if he is the Dog, how hard is that? I'm a Dragon, after all."

_But the fates believed that Young Hatori was too arrogant for their liking. Thus, Hatori never get even a glimpse of the Dog. The only kid his age was a little boy who kept saying sorry for no apparent reason. In short, the party was boring. That would be ok if he could only tell his father proudly that he managed to befriend the Dog. But, alas, at the end of the day, only disappointment shone in his father's emerald eyes. Not the twinkling of pride and satisfaction of a job well done that he envisioned._

_Hatori sighed at the thought. He would try his best to find the Dog today. Even if he had to break into the scary-looking house._

_His mother who was sitting beside him asked gently, "What is the matter Tori-chan? Are you feeling well?"_

"_Nothing, Hahawei. I'm fine."_

"_Well, don't look so down. I'm sure you would have a lot of fun in this party!"_

_Hatori smiled. His mother was the only one who could bring forth such a smile. She was the only one who ever made him felt needed. If only his father would be the same. Well, he was determined to change that today._

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_It was the same as before. The boy was nowhere in sight. Only one more place left to search. The mansion._

_His little heart trembled at the thought of entering the house which looked exactly like the haunted mansion in the TV. He gulped as he stepped onto the wooden floors, jumping when a breeze gently rang the wind-chime._

_Mentally berating himself for his cowardice, he pushed down his fears and forced himself forward into what his mind believe was his doom, his heart pounding at 100 mph._

_When nothing hideous jumped out to maul him, Hatori let out a sigh of relief. That was when a blood-curdling shriek rang as hands grabbed him._

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_Shigure and Ayame were having the time of their life, playing hide and seek. The mansion was just perfect for the game with its many hallways and rooms. Today, Shigure was 'It' and he was looking for his silver-haired friend. When he passed by the reception hall, he saw the shivering boy standing at the doorway, uncertain as to enter the hall or not. He was so absorbed in that, he didn't even notice the prize he had been hunting for, who had a gleeful and evil smile carved onto his face. _

_True to his prankster nature, Shigure crept up the boy from behind and proceed to scream like banshee while grabbing the boy's shoulders roughly. The effect was simply wonderful and till the present day, Shigure would still laugh about the memories._

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_Hatori jumped a mile up into the air before crashing down onto the wooden planks, screaming out his heart, certain that death was at hand. Tears of fear streamed down his cheeks uncontrolled as his hands flailed in a last and futile attempt (in his opinion) to save his life from the terrible monster that held him. He squeezed his eyes shut and waited for the fatal blow._

_But it never came. Instead, laughter pierced the silence after his scream ended. Relief washed over him at that. No monster would laugh. In all the stories he had watched on TV or read in a book, the monster would kill its victim after it had caught it, not laugh. Puzzled and curious, he slowly cracked his eyes opened and looked around._

_There, rolling on the floor, tears of mirth streaming down his cheeks, was a black-haired boy who looked to be his age. Wait. Black-hair, checked. Boy his age, checked. Now, the final confirmation. The eyes._

"_What is so funny?" he asked, unable to keep the indignity out of his voice._

"_You! And how you jumped!" and the boy broke off into more laughter._

_But Hatori saw the chocolate-coloured eyes. This was the boy he was looking for. Now is his chance. Before he could talked, a timid voice asked, "Gure-chan? Is everything ok? I heard screaming just now?"_

_Hatori turned to lay eyes on an angel. That was the only description his childish mind could provide at that time. Standing at the door was a frail-looking girl clad in the purest white. Large amber eyes, sparkled from the tears that threaten to fall. Finally, the silver moon-spun hair, glinting under the sun, gave an otherworldly yet pure glow to the being standing in front of him. Hatori was too stunned for words, unable to even breathe normally._

_At the voice, the boy ceased his laughter and looked at the angel. The sight of tears blurring the rays of the twin suns was too much for Shigure. It tore at his heart and he berated himself for bring forth tears in those eyes when he had promised himself that he would prevent them. He quickly leapt up from the ground and rushed to the boy while saying, "Aya-chan! Everything is ok! Don't worry!" He flung protective arms around the trembling boy, making soothing sounds._

_The boy's action jolted Hatori back into his senses. He really admired and envied the boy for being able to approach and hug the angel. He wanted that to. To stop the tears from falling. No, the angel did not deserve that. He must be happy, smiling._

"_Erm, Angel-san are you ok?" Hatori asked hesitantly, though the concern was apparent._

_Happy that someone else was concern for his friend, Shigure smiled that the boy and answered, "Aya-chan is fine. I guess I'm the one at fault here for scaring you and him. Sorry. Oh, by the way, I'm Souma Shigure. The Angel-san is Souma Ayame. Who are you?"_

"_I'm Souma Hatori. Please to meet you, Shigure-san, Ayame-san." _

_The angel or Ayame, finally pushed away from Shigure, looked at Hatori shyly. "Please to meet you too." A hesitant smile and a blush grace his features. Hatori instantly swore fealty to the angel, to protect the priceless smile. _

"_Alright. Ha-chan, you wanna play with us? Don't go back to the party. It's so boring!" Shigure was ecstatic that he had another friend and playmate._

_Hatori, on the other hand, was happy to be able to befriend the Dog and the angel. All his father's command to stay away from a silver-haired, golden-eyed kid was tossed aside._

_Eventually, Hatori was allowed to join the blood pact. The shock he received when he realised that Ayame was a boy__left Shigure rolling on the floor while Ayame fumed about stupid blind boys. However, the ceremony was repeated and the three boys became blood brothers, innocently believed that nothing could part them and everything would be ok as long as they had each other._


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **Fruuba is still not mine.

**Warning: **BL. Bloody torture. Suicide attempt. Insanity.

**A/N: **I really took my time with this story. It's been what? A year or more since my last chapter? Sorry. Here's the _OVERDUED_ chapter. I'm sorry. I was drawn away by DBSK and other pairings. Gomenasai! I'll TRY my best to update asap but no guarantees. *My muse just won't cooperate TT__TT*

**Chapter Two**

Ayame sat on a bench in park. Somehow, he had wondered into the park and there he sat after he left Shigure's house. He didn't how long he had been sitting there and neither did he care. Snow was falling and the temperature was fatal to him. But Ayame did not care. In fact, he welcomed the onslaught of winter's chilled fingers, gripped him body, embracing him like a lover. The cold, so cold that pain spread throughout his already aching body, made him feel alive. If not, there was only the all-consuming void, looming just behind pain, threatening to eat him alive from inside.

Akito was right. No one loved him. No one would or could. Yuki detested him. Kyou hated his guts. The family would have nothing to do with him. Even Hatori and Shigure. Hatori was too blinded by his love for Kana to realise anything else. Shigure was either too busy with his novels or his fetish for high school girls.

No one cared about him. No one thought of him, except for Akito and Ayame shivered at the thought. How he wished that at least Hatori or Shigure would care. But he was sorely mistaken. The blood pact that meant so much to Ayame, that sustained the snake for so long was nothing but a childhood memory to them. Ayame even doubted they would remember it. And the thought send a thousand knives through his already wounded heart. It wouldn't be too far-fetched to say his dying heart.

Nevertheless, to Ayame, that was the kindest and most caring gesture anyone had ever done for him. For that, he cherished both Shigure and Hatori, as much as he loved his brother, and would do anything to protect them. Absolutely anything, even letting Akito had his way with him.

As long as both of his friends and his brother were safe, any torture was fine. Even though he knew he was slowly dying from it, he would try his best.

But that day, Ayame felt like giving up. He was so tired. So lonely. No one saw him but Akito and the crazy boy was… crazy. His body was still stiff and hurt from last night's event, every bit of movement sent jolts of pain throughout his body. When he denied Akito's claim that no one loved him, Akito had beaten the shit out of him, taking care to avoid the face and hands. Thinking back at the reception at Shigure's house, Ayame couldn't help but laugh hollowly at the truth of Akito's words. Tears brimmed and fell from his eyes.

His soul was weary to the point of breaking while his body was beyond that already. He just wanted to lie down and sleep forever. If he was asleep, he would not be hurt anymore. He wouldn't need to care about love, hate and loneliness. There would be peace at last.

Thus, he was sitting there, mesmerised by the falling snow, waiting patiently for Lady Death to welcome him into her loving embrace. The snow was so pure, unlike him, defiled and dirty.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Akito felt the weakening bond, the line fraying and breaking. Panicking, he fuelled more essence into that particular line, even taking some from other less important lines to provide for the dying line. As long as the Snake was kept alive.

While he struggled to keep the connection from breaking, he gasped to Kureno. "Go and find the Snake. Hurry!"

After Kureno left, he turned his attention back to making sure the Snake alive.

Even though he detested the Snake, the man had given him much pleasure as a toy. Like a spoiled brat, Akito was not ready to give up his favourite toy. Besides, if he was honest with himself, he was still attracted to the Snake. The attraction he felt after he first laid eyes on the silver beauty. His prediction of the Snake's unsurpassable beauty was justified. Even his beloved Yuki paled in the presence of his older brother.

Heck, he would be lying to himself if he denied that part of the deep love he felt for the Rat was due to his resemblance with Ayame. Only the effect was different. Yuki had dark, midnight-hair and amethyst eyes, soft and mysterious. Ayame, on the other hand, was the sun, stunning with his long silver silk-like hair and golden eyes. While most would refer to the brothers as the sun and the moon, their beauty equal and complementing, Akito knew better. Ayame had grace, his features perfect compared to Yuki. Like the sun, he outshone Yuki in every way, be it beauty, grace, academics or health.

Yes, Akito was as obsessed with the Snake as he was with the Rat. The only difference was he wanted to break the Snake completely for not falling in love with him, for not adoring him as a Juunishi should. He knew that if Ayame showed even mild interest in him, the Snake would surpass the Rat in his heart. But Ayame did not and pushed him away. For that, his hatred for the Snake won and grew with every rejection. Thus, Akito thrived in torturing the Snake, physically and mentally. He would never even contemplate in hurting any of his Juunishi, however unimportant they are in his eyes. But torturing Ayame was his favourite. Last night was his best conquest yet.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

"_No one loves you, Ayame. No one would. No one could. Only I care about you. The rest just couldn't be bother with a worthless piece like you."_

_The comment nailed Ayame's deepest, darkest fear. He just couldn't accept like that. If he himself acknowledged it, he would have nothing left. Not even the hope of someone loving and caring for him. He was quick to object, but that only earned a sharp slap across him face._

"_Insolent fool. You yourself know what I say is the truth. Just accept it."_

"_Never!" Ayame cried in defiance, tears streaming down his abused cheeks._

_Akito's eyes narrowed at the protest. He just couldn't understand the Snake. Why would Ayame go against him? Why can't the Snake, just for once, be totally submissive and obedient? Whenever Akito felt like he had finally broke the Snake, he would only be proven wrong by the burning, albeit small, flame of determination and will in the Snake. This time, there was no difference._

_Angered by the still alive flame burning and his yet again failed attempt to douse it, Akito proceed to torture the already injured Snake. _

_By the time he was done with the man, the porcelain skin was covered with bruises and blood. Cuts criss-crossed the magnificent body, blood oozing out from newer ones. Burns, long and thin like the poker he used, covered most of the Snake's front while strips of lashing wounds decorated the back. _

_Ayame shivered from pain and fear. He felt weak, his body on fire from all the pain and blood lost. His amber eyes were shut tight to deny the torture, to deny it further access to his mind and thus killing him. The pain itself was more than enough. His mouth was wide in a silent scream, his throat too sore from earlier. As he thought everything was over and he was struggling to get up, a another jolt of pain, more extreme than the rest coursed through his body and fully assaulted his weakened mind. A scream, blood-curling, was forcefully teared out from his wounded throat._

_Akito was laughing maniacally as he heard the scream., never stopping from pouring salt into the several wounds that decorated the porcelain skin. That was for defying him, for going against god. No Juunishi of his was allowed to do that. Not even his favourites such as Yuki and Hatori. Yuki gets to stay with Tohru only with his consent. Without it, the girl would have already been long gone from the Souma Clan's lives._

_Truly, Ayame was a wonderful toy._

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Ayame shook from last night's memory. He wanted to forget it. The pain. The sorrow. The hopelessness. The loneliness. He wanted to forget everything. He wanted to be safe in Lady Death's embrace, in eternal sleep where nothing could haunt him.

Just as he thought that he could feel her gentle touches, a burst of energy flowed into his weak cold body. Sensing it coming from none other than Akito, he tried to cut off the life line connecting him to his god.

But Akito was not cold and dying. He was not on the verge of fainting into oblivion. Unlike him, Ayame was as weak as a newborn. He was surprise he had not change into his Snake form yet. Maybe he was too weak. Too weak to even refuse the life-giving energy that Akito was forcing on him.

Why wouldn't Akito leave him alone? Why can't he die in peace? Why deny his once chance in freedom? WHY??

Ayame did not know how long he tried to resist Akito's assistance, or insistence to keep him alive just so the god could torture him. He was about to give up when he could suddenly feel it. He could feel the struggle Akito face to keep their life-lines connected. To keep forcing energy into his body. Akito was getting weaker. He could feel it. And he relished in the feeling of Lady Death's feather-light touches on his skin. He was eager to dive into the calming black pool that was death.

Ayame doubled his effort to break the connection he shared with Akito. But same as the young god, Ayame was getting weaker, not only from the struggle but from the cold too. However, he could feel the line fraying.

A content smile graced his faced as darkness consumed him, his last thoughts, "Finally, peace and freedom…"

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Shigure was in his study when the phone rang.

"Mushimushi. This is the residence of Souma Shigure. I'm Shigure speaking. May I know who is this and why are you calling"

"Shigure. It's me, Hatori."

"Ha-san! Ohisashiburidane! How are you? Me and the boys and Tohru-chan missed you a lot!"

"I'm fine."

"I see. So, what can I do for you?"

As usual, Shigure was sharp, knowing that Hatori would not call just to 'say hi'. But then, Hatori seldom call, thus calling would naturally mean something big was up and he needed help.

"It's… It's Ayame. Have you seen him?"

"Well, just today. He came to visit us but left for his shop when Kyou practically tried to throw him out of the house while Yuki expressed his utmost loathing for Ayame's presence. Why are you asking?"

Hatori gulped. He did not want to confess that he was worried about the Snake and actually missed him. This would make the Snake even clingier than usual and he did not want to deal with that. Thus, instead of telling the truth, he said, "He had a medical check up appointment with me and he is an hour late."

"I see. Well, why don't you try the shop? He did say that he was going to the shop to finish his orders."

"Ok, thanks." Hatori hesitated before plunging on, "Do you notice any difference with Ayame? He looked somewhat off these past few days."

"Hmm… Am I sensing concern? Possibly love, Ha-san?"

Hatori chocked at the suggestion. "Well… Of course I love Ayame. He's my best friend. So, you sense any difference?"

Shigure was about to deny it when he thought of the pained expression he saw just two hours ago, an expression he thought long gone from the sculptured face.

"In fact, I do. What is the matter? Did something happen that I should know about?" Concern gripped Shigure's heart, the emotion powerful in his query.

Hatori sighed. Even Shigure didn't know anything about it. "It's nothing I know about. Well, please try to look out for him."

"Yeah, I will."

"Ok then. Bye."

"Bye."

Hatori sighed as he put down the phone. Usually, it would be hard to avoid the loud and brash Snake. But today, he was having a hard time looking for that particular man who should stand out in anyway and anywhere. What was going on? What was happening to his dear friend?

With this questions whirling in his mind, he picked up the phone to dial the number of Men's Romance, hoping he could reach his quarry there.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

As Shigure hung up the phone, his face was donning a rare crease of worry. Not only he noticed it, even Hatori, who was blinded by his broken heart, could sense the difference in Ayame. This did not sit well with Shigure and the Dog had learned from experience to trust his instinct and hunches. They never failed him before.

But what could be haunting his angelic friend? He had believed that by escaping the clutches of Akito and the Souma Clan, his friend was finally free from heart break. But he was wrong. The expression he wore just now, was the exact replica of the days when they were younger. When Ayame was haunted, or should he say, shunned by his family members, especially his parents.

Shigure was worried. If Ayame was hiding that from him, god knows what else was he hiding? And when had the Snake learned such skills as to hide his feelings so well. So skilled that even Shigure, who prided himself at his talent to read a person, even Akito. However, Ayame had managed to fool his eyes. He had fully believed that the Snake was truly happy and satisfied with his life, his only regret was his neglect to Yuki, which he was trying hard to make up now.

He could not believe that he failed to notice the problems faced by the angelic man whom he had sworn to protect when he was four. Shigure still remembered the promise he made to himself when he saw the beautiful and innocent smile. Though it was made with childish naivety, he still meant to keep the promise throughout his life. Yet now, a shadow was threatening the smile for quite some time and he never noticed a thing.

Thus, to fulfil the promise, his mind whirled as he figured out how to help his friend.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Akito heaved a sigh of relief.

Kureno managed to get to the Snake on time and prevented the idiot from dying. He was so angry at the suicide attempt, Akito had already planned out in detail the Snake was going to go through after he was deemed healthy again.

He still remembered the struggle the foolish Snake put up to slice the life-line connecting them together. The effort and strength was unbelievable for a man who was weak from hypothermia and physical injuries. He almost succeeded in his suicide attempt and would had died had not Kureno arrived and managed to get the Snake to the nearest hospital for help.

Akito shuddered at the thought of losing his favourite toy. The Snake had proven to be a very enjoyable specimen to torture. His resilience was another added bonus to the whole package. Akito was proud that he managed to arrange such an arrangement with the Snake. Not only did he get to torture and punish the Snake for his rejection and insolence, he also could enjoy the company of the beauty without having to stoop to being nice to the fool.

It started when Ayame was around twelve when he first tortured the boy. The memories were sweet and brought forth a satisfied smirk on the god's pale face.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

"_Akito-sama, Shigure-sama, Hatori-sama and Ayame-sama are here to see you."_

_The small, fragile boy nodded his approval. His face was as expressive as a stone but his heart raced in anticipation. His favourites, the Dog and the Dragon. He couldn't wait to see them because they were the few people who actually like him for who he was and would play with him. Around them, he'd felt like a normal kid. Though the ancient part of him knew that all that was just a momentarily façade to escape from the pain and hopelessness of his existence, nevertheless, even god needed a break sometimes, however brief and short it might be._

_Now, if only the Snake was not here. But he would not complain. To enjoy both the Dragon's and the Dog's genuine company together (it was never the same when they came separately. The jokes and games just weren't as good), he'd had to endure the Snake, no matter how reluctant he was. He could order for the Snake's absence. Heck, he'd tried that before, but somehow Hatori and Shigure just weren't that bright and happy as to when the damned Snake was there. It's like the trio came in a package. Either you take it or you leave it. And Akito'd be damned before he rejected the offer._

_The laughter brought the young god back from his reverie. In walk the three stunning kids, a few years older than him. Even Akito suck in a lung full of air every time the trio appeared. They just look so good together, each complementing and accentuating each other's beauty, though it's undeniable that Ayame won hands down among the three._

_Shigure was tall and well built for his age. He had honest chocolate eyes which were matched perfectly with his happy-go-lucky attitude in life. Ironically, his smile was always twisted with mischief which cast an overall naughty look on his handsome features, only to be emphasized with his jet-black hair, a shroud to hide away all his tricks and pranks. On the other hand, although possessing the same jet-black hair, Hatori was the epitome of good behaviour, forever the obedient one in the trio. This acted as a moderation to Shigure who was forever up to his sleeves with jokes and pranks. While they had similar hair and facial structure, Hatori's eyes were a set of the clearest pools of forest green. Instead of mischief, there were__ kindness and patience etched to the Dragon's face. Always the quiet responsible one, his attitude balanced off the extreme brashness of the Snake. Standing out like a star at night with his silver strands among the two black-hair boys, Ayame was by far the most feminine one in the trio, out besting the other two in grace and taste. However, this only served to accentuate the gentlemanly behaviour of Hatori and the playful protectiveness of Shigure._

_The laughter was music to his ears, a tinkling of pure innocent mirth which wasn't there before when the trio last visit. Whipping his head to face the boys, he saw for the first time, an unguarded Ayame laughing helplessly at something Shigure said. Come to think about it, that was the first time he saw or heard Ayame laughing. Ayame was always silent in their visit, talking quietly to the other two and answering Akito when he had to. Thus, Akito was not prepared for the drastic change on Ayame's face once the guarded expression was lifted. SO beautiful, it took all his breath away all over again. Stunning. Only a boy in middle high and already a stunning individual._

_With that thought circling his head, a powerful emotion surged throughout his body._

_Jealousy._

_Jealous at the beauty whose dazzling features surpassed his own._

_Jealous at Ayame for stealing his two of his Juunishi, his favourites no less. The nerve of that Snake! Each and every Juunishi should focus all their attention on him, not others, him and him only. But thanks to the Snake, two of his favourites were preferring him over Akito. That was unforgivable. No matter how gorgeous and how attractive the person was. In addition, the Snake had scorned him. The impudent fool must be punished!_

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_Ayame just couldn't understand the unconditional adoration both of his friends felt for the sickly boy. Albeit, the boy was pretty and cute, didn't they notice the malicious eyes which held too much wisdom for a boy of nine?_

_But no, all they saw was a helpless innocent boy in dire need of they love and attention. Since they first saw him as a baby, Shigure and Hatori had fell completely in love with the baby. From that day onwards, they had stubbornly insisted on visiting the god every SINGLE day. To make matters worse, they would not come without him tagging along, despite his furious protest. Somehow or another, they must dragged the reluctant Ayame with them to visit Akito._

_Ayame himself knew that there was no love lost between him and Akito. Both had mutually understood that love and understanding was not possible between them. Thus, both had fallen to hating each other contently. Though Ayame did not deny that he was jealous of the boy for stealing his friends from him – Hatori and Shigure spent less time with him since they were forever hanging out with Akito, he firmly believed that the hatred and distrust he felt towards his God was not hatched due to the green monster he harboured. However, it might be fanning the flames of hatred in his heart._

_With that thought in mind, he proceeded to present himself to his saviour and his doom, his God._

_Never was he as shock as then when a pair of eyes, spilling with malice and hatred locked onto his as the lips arched up to a smirk, the intensity of it sending a shiver down his spine._

_The message was clear. Hatred was just a mild adjective to describe the feelings of Akito towards Ayame._

'That's it. It's time to leave..'

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_Throughout the two hours, Akito had been working on the suitable punishment for the Snake while enjoying Shigure's and Hatori's company. Or as much as he could with a sulking Snake at the corner. What a wet blanket!_

_However even with Ayame there, he was having the time of his life still. Throughout his short life in this body, no one had treated him like a human, much less a child. His parents loved him, but as the Master of the Juunishi, the head of the Souma Clan, not as their own child. Instead of love and care, he received formality and strict disciplinary treatment from them. Only Hatori and Shigure would play with him; worry for him; love him; treat him like a normal human being. With them, he got to relax and throw literally everything out the window, his identity, his troubles and his loneliness._

_This was the reason why Akito was so obsessed about them, why he was particularly possessive with these two Juunishi and why he would tolerate even the hated Snake's company._

_And, since they were exceptionally important and talented Juunishis, the family and more importantly, his parents consented his spending time with them. _

_Akito was determined. No one was going to take them away. He would even kill just to make sure of that…_

"_Hey let's go. We still have homework to do." _

…_starting with the idiot who even dared to suggest that._

"_No!" Akito protested. Not so soon, just a little longer._

_But it was all in vain, Hatori and Shigure, reminded of their homework, could only looked at him with apologetic looks. "Gomen, Aki-chan. But we really have a lot of homework today, not to mention the test we have to study for tomorrow."_

_Akito was severely disappointed. However, overriding that emotion was a torrent of anger, coursing through his body. "Fine." His tone was icily commanding. "You two may leave. But Ayame must stay."_

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_Ayame jolted when the sliding door shut with a sharp snap, cutting off the only route of escape from the dark room, dimly lit by a soft glow of sun light which filtered through the paper door._

_Despite their weak protest, no one go against a direct order of God. Thus, here he was, in this dark eerie room while Hatori and Shigure left, alone with the psychotic boy. Why him?_

"_So, you can't wait to leave me is it?" the voice was void of emotion and eerily calm. '_Like the calm before a storm.'

"_No. It's like what I say, we had a lot of homework to complete." Though he was terrified, he refused to show any sign of weaknesses to the boy._

_Akito chuckled lightly. "Spare me the lies, Hebi. I know what you are thinking. The life line connecting you to me gives me access to your feelings. And I know that you actually feel like bolting off right now. And I also know that you are actually jealous of me which led you to lying."_

_At this, Ayame was unable to suppress the violent shudder._

_This only brought out a cruel hysterical laugh from the boy. _

"_Yes, you should fear me."_

_Suddenly his vision blurred as a sharp pain bloomed on his right cheek. _

"_You should never steal them from me"_

_His left cheek this time._

"_You should remember your place."_

_Right again._

"_They are mine."_

_Left and this time, Ayame fell onto the floor from the sheer force of the slap._

_He never thought that Akito would be this strong. The boy was so thin and frail, Ayame had always thought that a blow would break the delicate bones._

_As he tried to rise, a snap and a jolt of searing burst on my back. A scream escaped Ayame's mouth. He turned to find Akito and his eyes fell onto the cruel leather whip on Akito's hand. A sadistic smirk twisted the exquisite face._

"_Ayame, this is a little punishment for you overstepping your place." The voice soft and dangerous._

_Thirty more strokes join the first one, each more forceful than before. Some landed on an earlier stroke, doubling the pain on his back. Each stroke brought fresh tears and a scream. _

_When the jolting pain ceased, Ayame was already crippled by the pain, his back felt like its skin were totally peeled off, exposing his raw tender muscle. He was shaking uncontrollably, the shivers punctuated by silent sobs wrecking his frame. _

_Just when he felt like he was strong enough to uncurl from the foetal position he assumed, a different, searing pain ripped another scream from Ayame. Turning with difficulty towards the source, he saw a thin strip of his fore arm burnt raw, the area blistering red and actually smoked, a burnt smell mingling with the stench of blood and sweat. After the initial shock, his eyes darted towards the Master of the Juunishi, who was laughing maniacally with a red hot poker in his grip. The sight of the cherry red metal brought out a gasp from Ayame as he tried to shrink away from the boy._

"_Do you understand that they are mine?"_

_Ayame weakly shook his head, determine to keep his friends. "No, they are my blood brothers. We promise to be together forever. Through thick and thin. AHHHHHH!!!!!'_

"_Wrong answer, Hebi." Akito held the poker at Ayame's arm as he spoke. "Whose are they? Who does Hatori and Shigure belong to?"_

"_You!!!!"_

"_Ahh.. That's better." With that, Akito withdrew the poker. On the left arm of Ayame, a large part of his muscles have turned a smokey dark brown colour. "Remember that. They are mine."_

_But Ayame didn't notice anything. He had fainted after the poker was removed from his skin. Lying in his own puddle of blood, his ivory skin was as pale as death and his once shiny hair, now soaked with blood and sweat was spread out all over him. The figure looked so pitiful and fragile, yet his beauty was still undiminished. Eeriely, he looked like an ethereal being or a creature from the myths, a vampire prince, or even a fallen angel. Truly, the Snake was beauty reincarnated._

_Akito couldn't help himself. His body moved on its own accord and by the time he realised it, the Snake was already in his lap as tears sprung from his eyes. "If only you listen to me, I would have spared you the torture. I would even treasure and worship you. Your position would be so high, none can take your place ever." That said, he gently leaned down and kiss those soft full lips, cold and pale from the lack of blood. _


	4. Chapter 3

**Alright. Chapter Three is up. The usual, people, BL, torture, angst (I seemed to be able to write angst only, I blame that on my angsty life), and UNBETA-ED. And although I would dearly love to own the Madabuchi trio, I don't have the means or the money to get them. And Kyou would kill me before I even lay my hands on Yuki. T_T Hehe. May I present to you...**

**Chapter Three**

White.

"Am I in heaven?"

A sharp slap greeted his question.

Now, he saw stars floating in his vision. He moved his hand to rub away the irritating stars but instead was grabbed by a pair of cold yet strong hands. In fact, the grip on his arm was hurting him. A lot.

"How dare you try to end your life? Only I have a say in that and I never give the green light for you to do so." The hiss was venom to Ayame's ears. The cold fury chilled his bones and left him shivering. H e was not dead. If not, he would not have to hear that voice again. As these bitter thoughts swirled in his head, he was caught off guard and a set of warm soft lips was forcefully pressed onto his.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

"Sorry but Ayame-san never came to the store at all. Ano sa, is Ayame-san ok? Because he really did promise to be here today but he has yet to turn up here. Ayame-san is never like that. He keeps his promise and besides, there are so many orders to be fulfilled. He knows that I can't manage by myself so he would most definitely be here. But he's not. So, is something wrong? Anything?"

"No, I'm just wondering. There's nothing wrong with him. After all, he has such a mundane and carefree life…"

"Hatori-san."

"Yes?"

"That is an insult to Ayame-san! Looking carefree in front of you does not mean that he really does have no worries or problems."

The engage tone rang in his ears.

"Ayame has… problems?"

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Warmth.

'_No…_'

So comforting in this weather.

'_Don't…_'

The possessive embrace, spreading delicious heat throughout his frozen muscles and bones, melting every frost that still lingered despite the amount of blanket he was under.

'_Not this again…_'

The wandering hands softly touching and worshipping his body, massaging, caressing. The calm before the storm.

'_I don't want to enjoy this… Not this…_'

Tears trickled down his cheeks. A soft hand gently wiped them away before a slap landed on them, signalling the start of a terrible oncoming hurricane.

"How dare you try to end your life, you filth?!" The voice dripped with venom. The soft touches hardened into painful grips, pinches and even punches, all raining onto his already weak body. Yet, within the rough treatment he received, he found pleasure as well, every abuse went straight down south, pooling at his abdomen.

It was strange, he was abnormal. But he could not help it, could not stop enjoying this strange addiction of him. Despite his numerous attempts to give up on it, his weird fetish for abusive treatment on his own body just won't stop. It was affecting his physical and mental health. He knew. But like a drug addiction, he couldn't stop.

Not since he had first forced himself to enjoy it, to seek refuge in his torn, painful and lonely existence. Harmful as it may seem and feel, yet, it was this fetish of his that had sustained him thus far. Without it, Ayame was sure he would have crumbled a long time ago. Just from the loneliness he felt. He needed the pain of torture to live. It was a confirmation of his existence. Every jolt that his brain registered proved that he was still alive and not just some sick imagination of a person.

A painful grip on his bottom brought him out of his reverie.

"Akito…sama…"

The black abyss that always seemed to swallow him whole were emitting dangerous waves of anger. "Ayame, have you forgotten our agreement? Do you want to break it now? I most certainly won't mind lavishing my attention on them."

Fear flooded through him. How can he have forgotten it?! He had almost put them in harm's way! No, he did not want the God to corrupt their innocence and ignorance. Better he kept on suffering than they losing whatever happiness they were left with.

"I am sorry, Akito-sama. It won't happen again. Please punish me for my mistake."

The smile was cruel, satisfied and… '_What was that? Relief? No, that couldn't be true. Maybe Shigure and Hatori but never him...'_

The rest of his thoughts were cut off by those warm lips again. Mentally, Ayame sighed in the completeness he felt, fearing that Akito might detect any of the enjoyment he felt during his torture.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

_This was the third time Akito tortured him. The first was a month ago and the second was just a week ago. Each time, the torture was getting worse and more elaborate. His back was criss-crossed with bleeding wounds, some half-healed from the last torture, others fresh ones and quite a number of reopen ones. The burns kept increasing, the old ones unable to fade as Akito kept burning them all over again with the cherry-red poker. Last week's addition of the intricately-decorated knife was not left out while this time, the addition was not that grand or special. _

_Just simple table salt, sprinkled all over him._

_He was sure his screams were heard all over the estate and further. Yet, not even a soul came to investigate. Shigure and Hatori, the only two person who cared for him, were not here. In fact, Ayame knew that Akito purposely chose this hour to summon him._

_His whole body was shivering from the sheer agony. Still, even with the agony of all three tortures combined, it cannot amount to the misery that stabbed and shattered his heart just an hour ago._

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

"_Ayame-sama." Even with the honorific, the contempt was still palpable. No respect even from his servant. "You have been summoned to the Main House."_

_He really tried but he couldn't stop the tremble of his body. The memory from last week was still raw in his mind, the wounds still healing._

"_Well, what are you waiting for? Go and get ready. Your father will drive you there." The eagerness in his mother's voice almost brought tears to his eyes. His mother, eager to send her son off to being torture, not that she knew it. _

_A glimmer of hope flashed in front of him. Maybe if he told his mother, she wouldn't send him there. She might even protect him from the crazy boy. He firmly stuck with the belief that deep down, she loved him. After all, he was her son and all mothers loved their children, or so the saying went._

"_Okaa-sama. I don't want to go. Akito-sama would only hurt me like he did the last time."_

_His mother's eyes narrowed at this, anger clear as crystals. Ayame's hope burned brighter but was doused by the reply._

"_No matter what, you still have to go and meet him. You should be thankful that he wants to even meet you, let alone touch you."_

_His heart broke at the next._

"_Maybe, if he tortured you long enough, he might begin to like you. So, you should just hold your tongue and let him torture you to his heart content. When he starts liking you, then you might be of some use to us."_

_This time, there was no stopping for the tears._

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

"_Ayame-chan."_

_Ayame winced at the caress that touched his wounds. _

"_I have a proposition."_

_He managed a croak, "Yes?"_

_The stoic face broke into a cunning smile. "Well, I am in a terrible position now. I am the Master of the Juunishi. When they tried to disobey me sometimes, I would have to discipline them. But the thing is, I am a bit temperamental, so I sometimes ended up hurting them too much. It's not like I don't love them but it's actually because I love them too much. I love them yet they broke my heart. So, it's natural that I feel anger. After all, the deeper the love is, the worse the anger. I need an outlet for my anger. With that, I won't hurt them, too much."_

_Ayame quietly waited for more, understanding where this was going and was just waiting for the request. But it never came. The silence stretched for quite some time before Ayame finally understood. Akito was waiting for his response._

"_So, you want me as the outlet?"_

"_Yes."_

"_No. Not in a million years. Not ever."_

"_Uh ah ah..Not so fast, Hebi-chan. You won't say yes? Not even for Hatori and Shigure?"_

_Ayame froze at the mention of those names. "What do you want to do to them if I say no?"_

_The malicious smile widen at the question. "Oh, it's just that they were quite independent don't you think? So smart and confident that they do not really dedicated themselves solely to me. How do you think I feel about that? Hurt by my two most beloved Juunishi, the anger I felt. Let's just say that by the time I'm finish with them, you won't be able to recognise them." And he ended that with a light chuckle._

_Ayame quiver at the thought. Not Shigure and Hatori. He had to protect them from this lunatic. They had so much to live for. They could go so far in life while he was nothing compared to them. And this was his chance to repay them for their kindness, for caring and loving him when no one would even acknowledge or notice his existence. He must protect them, even though it's just to preserve their love and trust for the Master. He just could live without it but he knew for a certainty that a torture session with Akito was all it took to destroy it and their mind. Besides, with the frequent summons, his mother might think that he was important and thus finally acknowledged him as her son and would love him. His father would finally be proud of him. And he would just try to seek pleasure in this hell he was force to live in. After all, he read somewhere that it was possible to enjoy and love pain. Some were even addicted to slicing their vein for the sheer ecstasy of it. If they could do it, he could too._

_Thus, clearing his throat, Ayame answered, "Fine. I agree. As long as you gave your word to never ever touch Hatori and Shigure."_

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Mine was worried. Ayame never went missing before. Despite everything, even when the wounds were life-threatening, he would always appear at the store. It was his only sanctuary from the outside world; a place where he felt accomplished; a place where he had a caring friend; a place where he felt safe.

Or that was what he told her. But Mine believed every single thing he said. For one, Ayame was very talented in designing and manufacturing clothes. So what if he was into clothing lines that promoted kinky sex? It did not undermine his talent. What's more, Ayame was extremely famous in the fashion industry. The brand Men's Romance was a must have to every kinky couple. Custom made costumes are sought after. Many of his woks received awards and recognition from prestigious bodies. Companies tried yet failed to charm Ayame into collaborating with them or selling some of his designs to them. Everyone from the fame to the nobodies in this field knew the name Souma Ayame.

Despite his fame, Ayame was still humble and kind. The truth was, it was Ayame who helped her. Mine was in trouble with the local mafia when she first met her saviour. At that time, they were after her for the debt her recently deceased adopted father owed them. Ayame first appeared in her life when the thugs were close to raping and killing her. His appearance in the alley way which she thought was her grave was like a beacon of hope to her. And he didn't fail her. It was Ayame who paid the debt and even paid for her college fees. It was thanks to him that she was able to graduate and pursue her dreams of becoming a nurse. That was why she always went back to the small shop where she used to stay, in the petite yet fully furbished house on the second floor, in spite of her hectic schedule as a nurse.

And it was during one of these visits when she first saw the bloody mess that was Ayame. She remembered walking towards the shop during the wee hours of the morning, planning to hide and surprise the man she considered as an older brother when he came to open his shop. However, all thoughts of the fun and surprise was completely wiped off her mind by the sight of the heap of a man at the front of the shop. The familiar stench of blood flooded her senses. But what struck the fear in her was the familiar red robe that was her silver-haired friend's favourite.

She remembered screaming. Then, using her spare keys to unlock the shop, brought the heap, which turned out to be Ayame, inside the shop. Thanking god for her experience in first aid and medical treatment, she proceeded to treat the ugly wounds that covered Ayame's whole body, the thought of who and why burning in her mind.

Ayame never told her who or why that person did it. He only pleaded with her to keep it a secret and assured her that it was normal. At the pleading tone and the desperate fear and pain on the face she came to love dearly, Mine had no choice but to agree. But after that, she quit her job at the hospital and became Ayame's assistant, an excuse to cover her true motive of becoming his personal nurse. He was her saviour and the sole reason she was even living. She was determined to protect him after he saved her that day. She took up residency in the second floor again. Though she had never dabbed her fingers in the field of designing, she soon found out that she had talent and even came to enjoy it more than she ever enjoy nursing. She had plenty of practice for her nursing skills, not that she relished in it as her skills were all lavished and even tested on Ayame who always came stumbling into the shop bloody and exhausted. Sometimes the wounds were light and not so severe, others it was even life-threatening. Mine dearly wanted to stop whoever that was torturing her friend or at least tell someone else about it but she could never betray the trust between her and Ayame. She knew that once broken, Ayame would turn away even from her and then, who would be there to help him and treat his wounds? So, Mine could only offer her assistance and her expertise as a nurse to Ayame.

But this time, she was frantic with worry. Ayame was missing. What if he fainted during his trek here in the snow? That would be fatal especially if he was covered with wounds as usual. That was why she couldn't prevent the reproach and anger she felt towards the ignorance of Souma Hatori. Ayame practically worshipped him and Souma Shigure but Hatori never even notice a thing. He even had the nerve to say that Ayame had a carefree life! Where was the so-called intelligence that Ayame kept bragging about? Where was the love and care that Ayame treasured? All she could detect was cold indifference from the voice.

"Ayame-san, please be alright…"

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

Yuki was puzzled. Someone had kidnapped Shigure and replace him with an imposter. Gone was the cheeky, careless grin on his face. The happy-go-lucky nature was missing. A frown marred the handsome features of his older cousin as the person with Shigure's face kept sighing after the phone call he received from Hatori.

"What's the matter Shigure? You've been sighing for the past half an hour. Care to enlighten me?"

"Ayame."

"Huh? What's wrong with Nii-san? He looked fine just now. A tad too annoying too."

Shigure sigh. "You didn't notice anything, did you? The absence of the twinkle in his eyes, his smiles never reaching his eyes and the flash of pain in his face. Did you even look at him properly, or do you ignore him like usual?"

Yuki was speechless by the retort. Never had Shigure talked like that to him. But his pride would not allow such a blow. "Nii-san is alright. After all, he has an easy life, considering his talents and characteristics."

The mirthless laughter, so mocking in his ears was not the respond he expected. "Easy? What do you mean easy? Ayame's life is never easy. Far from it, he had to struggle as much as you do. Only, you never saw it."

His mind just refused to wrap around the idea of his brother had anything but an easy life. Not his brother who always looked so accomplished and confident. Not the man that he had worshipped secretly when he was younger. Not him who seemed like he never met a hitch or a problem in his life. But then, everything he thought of was accompanied with a 'looked' or 'seemed'.

…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…f.r.u.i.t.b.a.s.k.e.t…t.e.k.s.a.b.t.i.u.r.f…

"_Gure-san, Tori-san, let's go!" The loud baritone was cheerful and musical. The boy could not help but be drawn to it, despite all of his mother's warning to stay away from his brother. But the loneliness he felt was too much. And the laughter and brightness in that voice promised fun and happiness to the little boy, if only he could reach his silver-haired brother. It was an oasis in this silent ancient house. Like a moth drawn by the flame, Yuki wondered towards the general direction of the jovial voice._

_They were in the garden, the three of them. They in their school uniforms, apparently just arrived from school, cracking jokes as they walked towards the house. Yuki peered at them from the shadows of the hall, his eyes glued to the one standing in the middle. He always laughed whenever the other two was around, never a smile when they were absent. Maybe if he approached the person now, he would accept him? When he was smiling and laughing like that? Yuki wanted that. _

_The oppressive atmosphere in his house was scary to his innocent mind and he longed for those warm happy feelings that surrounded the three of them. Those golden eyes – usually cold and lifeless – were filled to the brim with warmth. He wanted those eyes to look at him like that, to have that loving gaze upon himself. He wanted the love, though his naïve mind did not understand that. All he knew was that if he were able to get that person to look and smile to him like that, all would be well and happy._

_As quickly as his little legs could carry him, the little boy rushed towards the trio who was still in the garden. _

"_Yuki-chan!" That would be Shigure nii-san, the one who would always spare sometime to talk to him while he waited for the appearance of Aya nii-chan. "Genki ka?"_

"_Hait." Came the hesitant, shy response. But Shigure could see that the little boy had only eyes for his brother._

"_A…Aya nii-chan" It was barely a whisper but all three of them heard it._

"_Ne, Ha-chan. Let's go up first. Aya-chan, you catch up with Yuki-chan." _

_Ayame was reluctant for his friends to go. He did not know how to face his brother still._

"_Aya nii-chan." Yuki was hopeful. The taller boy hadn't turn and left him like always. Maybe this time, he would be allowed into that elusive world of laughter. He reached out his hands, his amethyst eyes brimming with hope. One his brother took his hand, everything would be alright._

_However._

_Those golden eyes seemed to be lost their earlier exuberance. Instead, a blank stare greeted his hopeful ones. No warm hands enveloped his cold ones. No words of comfort or love. _

_Nothing._

_The taller figure, shining under the sun like an angel with his silver-hair, turned and left the little boy there, tears streaming down in both of set of eyes._

'Gomenasai, Yuki-chan.'


End file.
